Wednesday, October 01, 2008

My Rescue Plan


As predicted, the number on my scale increased by two pounds. Which really got me thinking about how to make it go back down. This is when I realized that government involvement might be what's been missing from my weight loss plan. You see, I've noticed that government involvement is really good for making assets shrink. So, I scheduled a meeting with President Bush and told him I was in need of a government bailout. He told me he would make sure they got involved. He said not to worry if at first the numbers increase. He said they might increase for several years, but that it would be well worth it, because after a while, one night I will go to bed and wake up in the morning 1 trillion pounds lighter. And, this is the best part......... the loss will stay with me for years to come despite all efforts on my part to gain it back. It's almost like a miracle!

Tell me how you did. Do you want the government to get involved in your weight loss plan?

37 comments:

MandieGirl said...

Ugh. I'm right there with you...gained a few over the last week.

Stampmouse said...

bahhaa yes indeed

Mr. Lindsay said...

I think that the photo in the blog was "doctored" using photoshop........ I know that I have seen Eric wearing that same suit and tie that President Bush is wearing.
I also believe that some body parts have been enhanced..... President Bush's nose, his eyes, his hands...........

Heather Lee-Reppen said...

I gained 2 also. So now I'm back to only 8 down and 42 to go...yikes. Wish my bank account went up so easily!

Maren said...

ROFL.....Sounds like you have no other choice.

NanaBeth said...

I knew the man was good for something. My biggest problem is the upper portion of my assets diminish disproportionately than those on the lower half of my body. That's why my favorite t-shirt says "The objects in this shirt appear smaller than they really are."

Julie said...

Nanabeth,

I so feel your pain. In fact, I'm thinking Victoria's Secret needs to come out with a Bigger Miracle Bra!

Angie said...

Well, I am way to chicken to step on the scales today. However, I didn't ask the government to step in and bail me out because they have already messed up so many things that I don't want them to "help" me out. My weight is already "mess" enough without help!

Ann Cicilie said...

Hm, if the governemtn could ban chocolate that would maybe do the trick?

I'm standby

AmyR said...

Hmmmmm well even tho I'm in Canada I'd totally be up for gov't funded lipo ;) That would be the easiest and fastest way ROFLOL and THEN mabbe a breakthrough where we could inject the fat where we WANT it to stay (at the moment I have no issues in that dept - I'm sure tho that when the pounds really do start to drop my "objects" will need some "enhancing".....;))

Kimmie said...

omg i am sitting here laughing so hard im crying. I lost 1 pound....and still not feeling great.

TxScrapAddict said...

I sure do!!!! But have to be careful there, government involvement also means those assets tend to become less valuable or even worthless over time......Ummmmmm.

Julie said...

txscrapaddict,

You're right, I hadn't thought of that. Hey, maybe I could find a foreign investor to bring their value back up.

lfalduto said...

Ok all I have to contribute is this....ROFLOL

ScrapAloha said...

ROTFL! ;)

Lulu said...

According to my Wii fit I'm down .9lbs... Although I am a little worried since I got the date wrong for my MOPS, and made a TON of dessert and now I'm stuck with it all. Yikes!!

ScrapMomOf2 said...

You made me laugh. Out loud!

Your rescue plan might need some more thought. Let's put it to a vote. I predict it won't pass.

Corey said...

HA!! you guys are so much fun!

Donna said...

okay Julie lets see your hands... your right hand is missing, what are you holding back there? I know its chocolate, it is chocolate, right?

wendy said...

OMG...that is hysterical!!! Yes, I believe the government should get involved...I have WAY more than 2lbs to loose so I can use their help!

I love the picture!

Becca said...

After a family vacation for five days of eating out I am up 2 pounds! I am definitely in need of a rescue plan!

Anthea said...

I think my scales are broke! well baby was picking them up and dropping them, so I am hoping thats why they havent budged in a couple of weeks, SO I am going with my clothes being the judge now, and you know what I just feel so much better!

Katie said...

LOL! I don't think I want any government involvement...but I do need some sort of intervention! I curse the day Hershey's marshmallow pumpkins were created.....up 3 lbs......UGH!

julieann said...

Happy Wednesday! I did not do fantastic this week, I only lost .6 of a pound. I think that it had to do with the pound of candy corn I ate last week:)

Nicole Lund said...

Bwaahaha!

I've only popped in a few times on Wednesdays and haven't posted til now but that was too funny! (I have lost 35 lbs since February by eating mostly raw and by training for a marathon -which I will do in a week and a half and then I'm going to need some new motivation or my assets will all increase again!)

Erika M. said...

Too funny - I've actually lost 4 pounds! I'm so excited.

Robyn W said...

i just laughed so loud at this, thanks for the giggle.....doesnt laughing lose extra calories too....

Catherine said...

Ha! Gives a new meaning to "big government!"

vtpuggirl said...

Haha, this is great! I laughed so hard at your pic, it's perfect!

mica said...

This is so funny. This is a big, serious problem everybody understands. Can we depend on the goverment? I think not. We've got take care of ourselves. Afterall, they don't care how we, people at the bottom, are suffering over this issue. I think my scale is broken too. It's showing 20 pounds more than a year ago. (lol)
I am also a strong believer of that chocolate cures everything. It's just small dosage doesn't work as well anymore...

Shannon said...

I'm in the same boat as you, and I did not do good today... yikes.

kfrankly said...

I actually lost 3 pounds! I've been half-heartedly trying for the past few months only to stay or gain more. I am finally doing what I say I need to do....so I completely understand where you are at...especially the need for chocolate!

Gail S. said...

You are so funny! I need the Biggest Loser to take over my weight loss! I stayed the same.

Chris C said...

Well I have been sick so with that in mind I lost 1kg this week, not a highly recommended diet, but it did work lol.

Beverley Todd said...

LOL! Nanabeth ... I am right there with you!
Julie: Too funny! LOL. I put on a pound this week - but then there might have been the odd choc chip cookie that jumped into my mouth when I wasn't paying attention. And maybe a jaffa cake or two. And a bag of chips - Ok, ok ... so I didn't exactly stick to the plan then. lol

scandi said...

I didn't do well this week- up a pound but I have a month to lose my goal of 7 pounds so I'm going to make a big effort next week and get back on track!
No comment on government... I'm tired...fading...

Elaine said...

Hilarious! I was finally 'good' for a few days and dropped 2....still working on it though - 12 weeks to go - hopefully will keep up that rate!